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• The successful marriage depends on one simple equation: Wife having Beauty Secrets and husband having Secret Beauties.
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| • There are only 5
things we need in life: Good friends, Good job, Good food, Good sleep
& Good _ UCK. Whatever u are thinking... is right. Good Day. |
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| • True relatives always stand behind u during bad times. Check ur marriage album. All ur relatives were standing behind u! |
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| • Tum sab dost meri zindagi ho, aur aur aur aur aur Lahnat hai aisi zindagi pe! |
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• Commerce joke: Do u know y in a couple's photo man is on the right side & woman on the left?
Because as per balance sheet liabilities are on left side and assets on right! |
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• Girl anounced her engagement. Father: Does this fellow have any money?
Girl: Oh! Daddy, U men are all alike, that's exactly what he asked me about you! |
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• Some translations in Punjabi:
Yo baby! Wassup? Ve kaka, a uttey ki tangeya va?
Listen buddy, dat chick is mine! O bhaoo, o nikki kukree meri aa !
R u nuts? Tu akhrot an oye?
Rock the party. VATTEY mar jashan ch.
Lets hangout! Aja bahar lamkiye. |
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• Young Malkin & Pappu Naukar were kidnapped & raped by robbers.
Malik to Naukar: Shakal Dekhi thi un logon ki?
Pappu Naukar: Bibi ji se pucho mujhe to ulta litaya hua tha! |
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| • Daru se Nasha
badhta hai, Nashe se junun. Junun se mehnat, Mehnat se paisa, Paise se
izzat. Isliye Izzatdar wohi hai jo Daru pita hai ! |
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| • Chandni raat
thi, nadi ka kinara tha, asmaan me taro ka nazara tha, Bihari premi ne
pyar se muskarate hue Biharan premika se kaha: Ae Susma, Bidi Piyegi ? |
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| • A Solid reason for having two girlfriends at one time: Monopoly is always damaging & Competition improves service! |
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| • If u don’t have
a gf/bf, don’t have a nice job, don’t like partying & dancing, just
have a boring life, then don’t worry just log on to www.rabba chukk
lay.com |
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• A cute Nurse came 4 the interview.
Dr: What salary U Xpect?
Nurse: Rs.10,000.
Dr was overjoyed & said: My Pleasure.
Nurse: With pleasure it’s 25,000 |
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• Which is the most confusing day in America?
Thinking?
Still thinking?
Fathers day! |
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| • Om Namah Shinay! Jai Sri Ram! Wahe Guru! Jai Sri Krishna! Darr Mat, kisi ko forward nahin karna hai, khud hi jap le... PAAPI. |
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| • In life, never look down on anybody, unless you are getting a lovely view of the cleavage! |
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• A Chinese couple Mr. & Mrs. Hua got twins without marriage. What did they name
them?!!!?
JO-hua, SO-hua |
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• Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal Nehru
We should learn to love our enemies- Mahathma Gandhi
Dasso hun bapu di maniye ya chache di? |
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| • There are only 5
things we need in life: Good friends, Good job, Good food, Good sleep
& GOOD _ UCK. Whatever u are thinking... Is right. Gud Day. |
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| • When things go
wrong, when sadness fills your heart, when tears flows from your eyes
always say these words... Eh Ganpat, chal daru la… |
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• Dil ke operation ko BYEPASS kyo kehte hain?
Kyon ki agar operation theek ho gaya to... PASS varna Hamesha ke liye BYE! |
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• Breaking News: Latest sponsor of the Indian Cricket Team: Whisper Ultra.
BCCI felt it appropriate as the team is undergoing its worst PERIOD! |
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• Lalu: Rabri, tum to hamara CHAND ho.
Rabri: Na ji hamka CHAND VAND mat kahiye, ye sasure America wale roj Chand pe chadte utarte rahte hai. |
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| • Gud looks catch
the eyes, but gud personality catches the heart. You are blessed with
both! Flattered? Don't Be! It was sent to me, and I just wanted you to
read it. |
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| • There was a man
who never romped or played. He never smoked or drank, nor kissed a
girl. And he passed away, insurance was denied. Since he had never
lived, they claimed he never died. So live it up. CHEERS |
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• Once upon a time a guy asked a girl: Will you marry me?
She replied: No!
And the guy lived happily ever after. |
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| • Daily Prayer: O
GOD, give us strength & capacity to pay Income Tax, VAT, CST,
Service Tax, Excise Duty, Octroi, TDS, ESI, FBT, Prop.Tax, Stamp Duty,
CGT, Water Tax, Prof. Tax, Road Tax, Edu Cess, Congestion Levy &
many more. Besides don't forget Gunda Hafta, Bribes, Donations, Chanda,
Beggers etc... If we have some time & money left after that, we
will do some Business. Cheers to Booming Indian Economy! Gud Day! |
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| • Behind every successful woman, there is a satisfied men! But behind a satisfied woman, there is an exhausted man...!! |
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| • All desirable things in life are either illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else! |
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| • There's a small
gap between confidence and over-confidence. You can kiss your
girlfriend is Confidence. Only you can kiss your girlfriend is
Over-Confidence. |
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• What would confuse a mentally challenged person?
Answer: A pineapple.
Confused...? I knew you would be! |
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• How to catch a squirrel?
Climb up a tree and just be yourself. Squirrels will come to you on their own. Because they just love NUTS ! |
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• A highly successful flirt was once asked: Which one is ur best gf?
He replied: The next one!
Always aim high n continuously improve ur performance. |
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| • The most
interesting thing about this sms is that by the time you realize that
nothing is written in it.... it would be too late for you to stop
reading it! |
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| • Expecting the
world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the
bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian! |
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| • If I was a
painter, u would be my painting. If I was an author, you would be my
story. If I was a poet, you would be my poem. But unfortunately I am a
psychiatrist. |
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• Hi, keep messaging me and win exciting prizes:
3rd Prize: Lots of Luv.
2nd Prize:Longlasting friendship.
1st Priz: Free stay for Lifetime in my heart. |
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| • No matter how
high the sky is, how deep the ocean is, how strong the wind is, how
wide the river is, I just wanna tell u... it's none of ur business. |
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| • Ladies....it is okay to wait for the right man to come along but in the meantime have some fun with the wrong ones. |
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| • Well, they do
say opposite attracts... So I sincerely 'hope' you meet somebody who is
attractive, honest, intelligent, and cuultured. |
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| • A teenage boy to his father: Here's my report card and a list I've compiled of entrepreneurs who never finished high school. |
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| • In order to get
100/100 in life, a man requires 100% talent, whereas a woman requires
only 4% talent & the remaining is only 36-24-36 |
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| • Miss U Miss U sab kahein, par actually miss kare na koi. Agar koi kisiko miss kare to fir SMS band kyun hoye! |
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• A Law Professor asks a Student: Which is the most imp LAW of Finance for Starting a New Business?
The Student replies: Father-in-Law |
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• A motorist hit a sparrow. He took d unconscious bird, put in cage with bread & water.
Bird wakes up, luks around & screams: Salakhen! My God! I've killed the motorist. |
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| • M_rkh, St_pid, B_dh_, D_ffer, Bewak_f, Ghoch _, _ll_, Bhondu_, dekha... Everything is incomplete without ‘U’ |
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| • As u face a
brand new day, bow ur head & say this prayer: Thank u Lord for
having this amazingly gud luking sender. May his smartness increases
everyday. |
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• A good friend comes 2 visit u in the hospital with flowers n goes.
A True friend sits near u n says: O yaar, nurse bahut sunder hai... aaram se theek hona! |
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• Q: Where do Indian batsmen perform their best?
A: In advertisements. |
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• Q: What is the Indian version of a hat-trick?
A: 3 runs in 3 balls. |
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sms 
